I think my breaking point was July 2012.  We had just gotten home from our family vacation, in Italy (which doubled as a honeymoon for my sister and her husband).  I was sitting at the computer looking through our vacation pictures, and I got a phone call.  You can call it intuition, but as soon as I heard her voice, I knew.  My sister was on the other line.  I could tell that she needed to say something but she didn’t know how.

“Did you get my text? I sent you a picture!”

I tried to sound as excited as I should have been. But, I was heartbroken to my core. I needed to be more excited for my sister than ever!  She was having a BABY!  I didn’t let her hear the pain in my voice.  I carried along with the conversation for as long as I could.

As soon as we hung up, I broke.  I sat staring at the computer screen with uncontrollable tears running down my cheeks.  She had gotten pregnant on her first night.

That was when I knew that I had to start our fertility treatments again!  I wanted to be a mom, more than I ever wanted anything else.

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